Sunday, November 16, 2008

Comedian-in-Chief of the USA

Recently when I was talking to one of my friends Radhe, he mentioned that he watched a few days back the deadly one-liners of Bush on YouTube and he almost split into half laughing. While it is such a disgrace to America for having elected someone like Bush for two terms, on hind sight one may feel it is a historical necessity for future generations for centuries together to take this as an example of whom to never elect. Coming back to the one-liners, I just searched on the net and compiled a score of them to commemorate and commiserate his two terms. Here they are. Straight from the mouth of the Comedian-in-Chief of the United States of America

Health Hazard caution: Some may cause you to be sick to the last bone.

  • This is an impressive crowd—the haves and the have mores. Some people call you the elite, but I call you my base.

  • For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it.

  • I have opinions of my own, strong opinions, but I don't always agree with them.

  • I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.

  • I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe - I believe what I believe is right.

  • I think war is a dangerous place.

  • I promise you I will listen to what has been said here, even though I wasn't here.

  • If this were a dictatorship, it would be a heck of a lot easier - so long as I'm the dictator.

  • It would be a mistake for the United States Senate to allow any kind of human cloning to come out of that chamber.

  • This foreign policy stuff is a little frustrating.

  • I'm the commander - see, I don't need to explain - I do not need to explain why I say things. That's the interesting thing about being President.

  • Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people and neither do we.

  • Do you have blacks, too? (To Brazilian President Fernando Cardoso)

  • When I was young and irresponsible, I was young and irresponsible.

  • You're free. And freedom is beautiful. And, you know, it'll take time to restore chaos and order - order out of chaos. But we will.

  • It is clear our nation is reliant upon big foreign oil. More and more of our imports come from overseas.

  • I think we agree, the past is over.

  • And there's no doubt in my mind, not one doubt in my mind, that we will fail.

  • We spent a lot of time talking about Africa, as we should. Africa is a nation that suffers from incredible disease.

  • I'm also not very analytical. You know I don't spend a lot of time thinking about myself, about why I do things.


Anonymous said...

Late night comedy has been thriving bcoz of bush. While in reality Obama won bocoz of bush.

Now Sarah Palin is taking place of bush.

Long live comedy


Anonymous said...

V Murali had this mail sent out a couple of days ago . . . i think it is an apt summary of Ramana's article . . .

An Israeli doctor says 'Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks.'

A German doctor says 'That is nothing; we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks.

The Russian doctor says 'In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks.'

An American Texas doctor, not to be outdone, says 'You guys are way behind, we recently took a man with no brains out of Texas, put him in the White House for eight years, and now half the country is looking for work.'


Anonymous said...

Fantastic compilation Ramana garu. Kudos.

Bush's presidency has not been harmful to just to USA but to the entire world. While he was accusing Iraq to be having Weapons of Mass Destruction, the entire world failed to realize that Bush was the lone WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION.


Anonymous said...

The best title for him will be Comedian in chief Emeritus, since I do not think any one will surpass him in our entire lifeteime.


Rajesh Kumar said...

This is an absolutely awesome compilation. Laughter is the best way to take revenge with the man, who perhaps first time in the history has fooled the entire world - no matter what one thinks of him, he's headed to Texas as the same rich man that he was, and probably spend the rest of his days fox hunting or building a George W Bush Presidential Library which will be helpfully bankrolled by his oil industry friends. No problem with that too, but Bush should be made to read some of those books to bring him to some intellectual level!